The entire floor was silent. Everyone was asleep, already far in dreamland.

Except for Kagome.

She was wrapped around the light cream coloured sheets, tossing and turning, unable to find rest. Her blood was boiling both with an unknown need and with mortification. She touched her fingers to her lips where the presence of his mouth still lingered. That was a kiss. They kissed before but it was nothing like this. Last time was messy and weird. It was still messy and weird now but - different. Gah! She could not even explain it. She did know it made her body thump with warmth she had never known until now. She might be a virgin but she was not idiot. She did not believe in fairytales, the perfect romance or even prince charming. She was realistic. Her life had been chaotic and it prevented her from being a normal teenager and now from being a normal young adult. It did not mean she was oblivious. She was eighteen years old and so far her kissing track records was three kisses. Two with Kouga… and one with Inuyasha.

And this was perhaps the most awful time to be thinking about him.

Also, none of that helped with her current predicament. She liked Kouga, there was no escaping that truth. However, it almost felt like it was spinning out of her control. They said they would try, she would try to figure out how she felt, they would get to know each other a bit more, get closer. They might have been friends five hundred years ago but that was a long time - or it was for him. Regardless of that, it did not prevent her from smiling like an idiot because he kissed her. And she worried. A lot - too much. He said this was her home and she herself was even more comfortable here than in her own house and yet she always acted like she was an intruder bothering them. She had one foot in, one foot out. And it was the same with their relationship.

Actually it was the same with every relationship she had. If her relation with Inuyasha qualified as such. Half in, half out. They were not seeing each other but he sure as hell made a big deal out of it when someone hit on her. And she did not like to see him with Kikyo. Well. Actually, she was all in. He was the one who made it half in and half out. She was willing to go the distance with someone who was not ready to give her the same thing. It did hurt. It was her first love after all. No, it was probably not going to happen again but that feel remained there.

Kagome rapidly shook her head, hoping to chase all thoughts of him away from her mind. All that was in the past. It was not like she still had feelings for Inuyasha. He was simply the only relationship indicator she ever had and even though she would never see him again, he was a good friend. They had a lot of good moments together and she never got to say goodbye. That was what made it hard to sleep at night or live her life like everyone else. A chunk of her life was taken from her and she had to pretend it never happened. How could she possibly do that? Then Kouga and the pack came in and all the sudden it was alright to remember her adventures and all the people she lost.

No time for sad memories. Plus, she did not lose everyone.

She still had Kouga.

Kagome rolled around until she was laying flat on her stomach. Sleep, she needed to sleep.

If she showed up downstairs with dark circles under her eyes, they would all think it had something to do with them. She was tired of worrying everyone over silly stuff. She shoved her head in the pillow, letting her face rub against the soft, white pillow case. It could not be that hard to fall asleep could it? She simply needed to shut her mind and forget about Kouga's lips. Easy peasy. She forced her eyes shut and pinched her lips together. And then she waited and waited. Unfortunately for her, no matter how hard she concentrated, no matter how much she wanted to fall asleep, her mind refused to let her find peaceful rest.

Again, she sighed.

She moved herself away from the pillow and then laid it flat against the bed's headboard. She then pulled herself in a sitting position, leaning against it. Kagome wrapped her arms around her legs and rested her head on her knees. She glanced around, looking at his bedroom. It was not her first time in here. She always borrowed - or stole actually - his bedroom whenever she came over. At least she was wearing her own pyjamas. After sleeping over so often, she had made sure to leave her soft, light pink, covered in bunnies, pyjamas behind, just in case. Although, it was not exactly the most mature choice - but it was awfully comfortable.

Good thing she did that or she might have had to wear his clothes. She did that once. She could still remember the smell of his shirt and the way she had embarrassingly inhaled it. She could not imagine sleeping in his clothes. Her eyes darted left, then right before finally, she jumped to her feet. It was not her bedroom and it was his private stuff and yet she found herself wanting to look around. She did not know much about this Kouga. She could tell he changed and he was not as young, as reckless, but he still retained the same core. He was a good person. She approached his cherry wooden dresser, letting her fingers run across the edge. That was where he kept his shirt - or at least it was when she borrowed one.

Her fingers dragged down and she kept on walking. There were no pictures, no real decorations; furniture and a bed. She knew this was their home and yet it did not feel much like a home. She even though this was an empty bedroom the first time. Why would he want memories in there? Then again, he could hardly judge; she did not know everything they went through during the past five hundred years. Things changed and life was not the same for them anymore. Kouga did not share much and he said it was fine but she could see it in his eyes. Little glimpse of the past, fleeting memories. It was more obvious when they went camping and everyone was allowed to transform.

Finally she reached the bedroom door. It was closed and staring back at her. Kouga was downstairs, probably not sleeping as he had mentioned. She knew the whole conflict weighted on him and she truly wished there was something she could do about it. The whole pack might be at risk and they were her family as well.

She reached out for the handle, wanting to see him, talk to him and perhaps distract him from the troubles at hand but she stopped herself. Already, a blush was creeping upon her cheeks. She knew exactly what it would look like if she went downstairs in the middle of the night. Especially considering how they said goodnight. Her hand hovered above the handle, uncertainty traveling through her. But Kouga might need to talk or vent. He did not have to talk about the conflict , which he clearly wanted to avoid for the time being, but she might be a distraction. At the moment he was downstairs, all by himself and that probably did not help.

Kagome sighed before wrapping her fingers around the doorknob. She silently opened it, slid out and then closed it behind her. She inspected the hallway, making sure nobody was there. Once the way was clear, she began heading downstairs. If Kouga was awake, he would already hear her coming but she still made sure to be as quiet as possible. Even though the entire floor probably knew she was awake, which only made her blush color further red. She could already imagine all the thoughts going through Hakkaku and Ginta's minds at the moment. She would surely hear a couple of innuendos about this in the morning.

After a few moments, she reached the last step which creaked beneath her foot. She winced, but kept going regardless. She tried to lean in towards the living room, hoping to catch a glimpse of Kouga but she did not. Could it be that he was asleep after all? The stress of the day might have exhausted him. Still, she kept walking until she reached the edge of the couch. As expected, she found Kouga, sleeping. One of his legs was hanging off the couch, his foot planted firmly into the ground. He had one arm thrown over his head, covering his eyes, and he was still fully clothed. He was way too big for the couch. There was no way it was comfortable for him; his neck was even all sort of twisted.

She had to give him his bed back. How could he even say that it was alright for her to take his bed? She was felt like a jerk. Although, if she woke him up, she would also feel like a jerk. She shifted her weight from her left foot to her right one repetitively, unsure of how to proceed. She should let him sleep. Even if clearly was confined to a small space. Next time, she would not let him convince her to use his bed. He would get it. She let her eyes roam over his sleeping form for a second longer before beginning to tear herself away from him. There was no way she would be able to sleep now. Not only was her mind buzzing with thoughts but guilt was now nestled in her chest.

Kagome would have made it upstairs.

If Kouga had not stopped her.

Before she was able to pull away from the couch, he gripped her wrist with his hand. The unexpected tug caused her to gasp. Rapidly, she turned her head to the left, only to find Kouga staring at her. His fingers were gently wrapped around her wrist but he made sure to use enough strength so that she could not pull away. His blue eyes were coated with a daze of haziness while he scanned her body from head to toe.

"What's wrong?" he asked, his voice coarse from the sleep.

She shook her head. "Nothing."

"Why did you come downstairs?" He did not mind. However, his instincts kicked into alert for a moment. He had been sleeping when he felt the flash of her aura and immediately he thought something happened to her. She was right though; she seemed fine.

"I- I wanted to make sure you were okay." And she could not sleep. And she felt bad. But she was not going to tell him all of that.

Gently, he let go of her arm and then, he slowly sat up on the couch before running his fingers through his hair. "It's stressful but nothing we haven't dealt with before."

"I know. I wish it wasn't so complicated and I thought - I thought you would be here awake." She grimaced. "Sorry I woke you up."

He shook his head. "I wasn't really sleeping." He only managed to doze off for a few minutes here and there. She was part of it and the whole baby thing was the main part of his problem. It was why he managed to sense her so easily.

Kagome stared at him and then the empty spot on the couch before deciding to sit down by his side. Their arms brushed up and he turned his head to look at her. "I was thinking, maybe I could talk to the girl. I've been there. Well not pregnant but I've been the what do you mean youkais girl." She shrugged her shoulders. "I know it wouldn't be much but maybe it would help her to have another human girl around."

"It could be a good idea," he said, never looking away from her.

He hated the fact that she had to see him so stressed out. It was part of their life now; everything was a risk, everything had to be a secret. They were not free like humans. Every move had to be calculated, they had to blend in, make sure they did not attract unwanted attention.

"I just don't know why he did that."

"Did what?"

"Go after a girl like that."

"I was under the impression that that's what guys do," she said with a smile.

"Not us. We can't," he replied, his tone much more serious than hers. "We can't just go around sleeping with everybody because then stupid shit like this happens. He should have known better. Plus, it's not in our nature to just whore ourselves around." Wolves mated, they found one person and they were loyal. Although, yes everyone had needs. Still, pleasure was a luxury and not many of them could afford it. Not when the stakes were so high. Their lives might look alright but it was more complicated than it appeared to be.

"I'm sorry," she said, moving her hand so that it rested on his.

"Not your fault."

She was close, her soft skin brushing up against his and there was only one thing he wanted to do; close the distance and nuzzle his nose in the crook of her neck. He did not dare though. She let him kiss her earlier but he did not want to step over too many boundaries. They were testing this whole thing out and he did not want to push her away. Every day that went by, he was more and more certain that this was what he wanted. However, he did not know how she felt and he did not want to bring it up. She would tell him when she was ready. Meanwhile, he would wait for her because this was it for him. She was it. He would make sure not to make any of the mistakes he did in the past.

But it was tempting, very tempting. Especially since like he told her, they could not go around and be with whoever they wanted. They were limited. But, he had her and he was lucky.

Kagome stared at their hands, a feeling of warmth spreading through her body. There was something about his aura, it was like it was tickling against her skin, warming her body up. It made her went to lean into him, into his touch. She dared to tilt her head to the side, letting it rest against his shoulder. He did not bulge, he did not flinch. He let her. Then, he moved his hand and intertwined their fingers together. She squeezed gently and let her thumb brush up against the side of his hand. She tried to ignore the fact that her cheeks were on fire and let herself relax. If she ignored her embarrassment, it was nice, calm and soothing to have him nearby.

Kouga turned his head, nestling his nose in her hair, inhaling her scent and letting it travel through him. He would be lying if he said it was not better with her downstairs with him. If they stayed like this, he might actually fall asleep. He was also slightly surprised that she initiated it but he would not complain.

She held back a smile while she felt digging his nose through her hair. Ginta and Hakkaku's words were fresh in her mind and she knew it helped her relax. He knew what to do; not only were his instincts driving him but he was not as unexperienced as she was. Every time she thought about doing something, she drew a blank. She did not know how to act or be around a guy. The simple thought of touching him, running her fingers across his tan, warm skin and she was already blushing deep red. There was no way she would actually be able to any of that. He touched her like it was natural, like he had done it his whole life.

He kissed her and she ran upstairs to hide.

Clearly she did not have the whole relationship thing down. Which is why sometimes she felt like a high school kid with a crush while he was more mature and serious. It was not like she was taking the whole thing as a joke. It meant a lot to her, which was why she had no intention of screwing it up or hurting Kouga. She did like him, she did want to be with him. She simply did not want to make a mistake that would cost her everything she held dear. It was best to have him in her life as a friend than not having him at all. Although she did like this, what they were now. He kissed her and he set her whole body on fire. How could she walk away from that?

Now that he touched her, kissed her… could she backtrack? Even if it did not work, could he go back to what they were before? It felt like the only way to go for them was up, not down. The same problems as before were there but it never stopped her growing feelings. She liked him.

"Kouga?"

"Mm?" The sound of his voice rumbled against her head.

Words wanted to be spoken but she did not know how to say them. Clearly, she was mortified. Yet there he was, waiting for her to speak. Why did she open her big mouth again? What would she say? What would it change? There was this need deep inside of her. She did not want him to hurt and she did not want to be away from him. He was like a soothing balm on all of her wounds but she wanted him to be more than that. She did not want to be with him simply because he salvaged her from the darkness of her life. She wanted to be with him because of who he was. And she liked who he was. Maybe the lack of sleep was clouding her mind or maybe it was the closeness but…

At that moment she had to admit she was screwed because she did want this.

Not only because he was from her past. Not only because she forgot the pain.

But because being with him felt right. Whenever something was wrong, her thoughts went to him. Whenever she was happy, she thought of him. She wanted to forget how screwed up she was, all the pain.

However, those words would not slip her lips and it forced her to use actions over words. Timidly, she pulled her head away from him. He looked at her, clearly still waiting for her to speak. She did not say a single word. Instead, she slowly inched her lips closer to his until they touched. At first he stayed still and she felt the heat coming to her cheeks. But then, he cupped the side of her face with his large hand, holding her in place while his lips moved against hers. She let her palms lay flat against his chest and she leaned in even closer. Kagome allowed herself to get lost in the moment, feeling alive, the rush of happiness, enveloping her.

After a moment, she was forced to pull away for air. Kouga rested his forehead against hers, his eyes still closed. He was not exactly sure of the meaning behind her actions but he was not about to complain. He needed it. Everything was crappy and she made it better. He always said he would give her space, let her go to her own pace but he almost wanted to be selfish. He did not want her to go back upstairs. He wanted her to stay with him.

And he told her. "Stay."

She tilted her head to the left, almost as though she was unable to look into his eyes. "Mmhm."

She kissed him and she was still too shy to speak up. She did not think she was ever going to get over that. Kagome leaned closer into him and she felt him lean back into the couch, his arm around her. The bed remained the obvious best choice but there was no way in hell she was going to suggest that. Then again, the couch might be just fine; neither of them had the intention of sleeping.

Kouga closed his eyes, his palm resting against her back. Her heart drummed against his chest and he could feel the heat of her blush through his shirt. He wanted to stay like this. Each time, it became harder to let go. Each time she gave him a taste, he wanted more. It was in his nature. He was not made to love many women at once. He was not made to be volatile. He chose her. Despite everything he told himself, he let his heart open up to her. He would not force her, he would respect her decision but it did not mean it was not going to hurt like hell if she turned him down.

Having her in his arms felt right and he was not ready to let go of that feeling just yet.

-U-

Eyes.

Many pair of eyes.

She blinked once. Then twice.

Nope, she was not dreaming. There were definitively people staring at her. She shifted uncomfortably before fully opening her eyes. Right there, hovering on top of her was Ginta and Hakkaku with big smiles on their faces. Why were they smiling like idiots? She blinked again. She laid her palm flat, trying to lift herself, only to realize two things. One, something strong was preventing her from getting up. Two, what her palm was resting against was not a bed - or a couch. It was a hard, muscular chest. Her eyes bugled and she looked back only to see Kouga with his eyes closed, his arm draped around her. She gasped before her entire face turned red.

No wonder they were smiling.

"Nice sleep?" Ginta asked.

"Bed would be more spacious." Hakkaku added.

"Yeah, you could, have more room."

"For activities and stuff."

"Yeah, and stuff."

If she could have sunk into the ground, disappearing into a pit of hollowness, she would have.

"And if ya don't both shut up, she'll be scraping you off the floor. How's that for activities and stuff?"

Ginta gulped and Hakkaku backed away. He was awake.

Kouga growled, as a last warning, and he heard the two of them scamper off. Although he was fully awake, he kept his arm around her. She had yet to say anything or express a real desire to be free. He had woken up first. She had been snuggled up in the crook of his neck, her warm breath tickling him, while her lips teasing his skin. He had been forced to shift their position slightly. He was not an animal. Well he sort of was. But he was not like a wild beast who had no control on his own instincts. He could lay with Kagome perfectly innocently. His body might have something else in mind, a very uncomfortable situation lurking, but he was not going to pounce her.

Still, he chose to move her.

And she had no woken up.

Not until those two idiots began staring.

"They're a little excited," he said as he finally opened his eyes.

She leaned back into his chest, letting the tension leave her body. It was not as though she was ashamed that they found her in this situation with Kouga. Although, she never expected either of them to fall asleep. Especially not him. It had been so warm, so comfortable. She did not even remember when she closed her eyes and let sleep claim her. His presence had been soothing enough that she forgot about all the troubles that filled her mind. Then again, he had been a major part of the thoughts trotting in her head. It would make sense that being by his side would help her forget. It had been a while since she had slept so soundly.

"I know."

And it was partly her fault; she asked them about wolf courting. Although, she was not quite ready to share that detail with Kouga yet. Even if she took a step last night.

"The others are starting to wake up too," he warned her.

He had no problem with people finding them in such a position but she might. They would assume things - more than they already were. She might not want to project an image of something she did not want. He let his hold on her loosened, almost making the decision for her.

"Are you hungry?" he asked while she sat up on the couch.

On cue, footsteps were heard coming from up the stairs. The others were coming down to deal with the problem which meant the girl would be there soon.

"I'll go in the kitchen. Give you guys some space," she said with a smile.

For a second, it felt awkward. They had now kissed twice - well three times, but twice since they started being honest with each other about their feelings. Her dating experience sucked and could not be relied upon. Should she? Could she?

He solved the dilemma for her. He leaned forward and pressed a kiss on her forehead. "It's the last day of this crap." No matter what way it went, whatever happened, happened. It was almost too late to do anything at this point. Izu should have been careful in the first place. All they could do was try and control the mess.

"It's gonna be okay," she said before rising a trembling hand and cupping the side of his face.

He might have slept but she did not miss the tiredness in his eyes. His body rested but his mind did not. She would do what she could to help soothe away some of the stress. That started with making sure he did not have to worry about her.

After a few seconds, she got up and others began to gather in the living room. She left them be and went into the kitchen where she found Ginta, sipping coffee out of a green mug.

"Not a word," she warned.

He smiled. "Why what happened?" he asked innocently.

"It wasn't like that."

"Of course not."

"Did ya nuzzle?" Hakkaku teased as he popped from behind her.

"Guys!" she said, her face turning a deep shade of red. "Why don't you go join them, this concerns you too."

"Nah, we're fine here."

She crossed her arms in front of her chest, attempting to look imposing. "I don't need a babysitter." They opened their mouth, ready to protest, but she did not give them the chance. "Go! I'm gonna go enjoy… some sunlight," she said as she marched all the way to the back door. She never turned around and she pretended that their pleas fell upon deaf ears.

Kagome loved the day she spent with them but she did not want them excluded because of her. They should be up to date with what was happening with their pack. It was not forever, it was for a few hours. Did she not say she would speak with the girl? They would see her then. For now, they should go and participate in the pack's discussion. Kagome pushed the door opened, forgetting she was in her pyjamas and stood on the back porch. It was indeed a beautiful day with the sun shining high in the sky. It was better than yesterday; before it was a sign of things to come. There had to be some way of making the girl understand?

What could Kagome tell her that would make a difference?

The only reason all of this made any sense was because she was thrown into it with no way out. After getting captured by a centipede and having a jewel ripped out of her body… it was kind of hard not to believe. And once she spent so much time with everyone, how could she not care? That was the problem. The girl did not know the pack, the history, the gravity of the situation. It would be hard for her to understand and Kagome could not blame her. A sigh rolled off her lips as she took another step forward before walking all the way around and finding her way to the front porch. She sat down on the first step, resting her chin in her palm.

She stared away at the street, watching the very few people walk by. Her eyes glanced over their faces until one felt awfully familiar. There, with a plastic bag in her hand was a girl with dark blue eyes and short brown hair. Yuka? When was the last time she saw her? Probably a few times after she returned to the modern era full time. It had been hard to stay friends after she missed so much. Her friends did want to stay in her life but she made it hard. She could not connect with them, she had not lived the same things as them. It was too difficult and back then she simply did not have the heart to try. She gave up and she let them slip away.

She saw her getting further and further away. "Yuka?" she tried calling out.

Suddenly, the girl stopped in her tracks and turned her head. She dipped it forward, clearly squinting. "Kagome?" Her jaw went slack. "Kagome!" She began running, her bag hitting her thigh with each step she took. "I can't believe it's you!" she said as she threw her arms around Kagome. "It's been forever. I mean, we called - but you never picked up."

And now she felt even more like crap.

"I mean, we thought it had something to do with Inuyasha. But then, you just - are you okay?"

Kagome nodded. "I'm really sorry. I just - it was a hard time."

Again, she had to somewhat lie. It was what she always had to do and it was the reason why she did not call back her friends. They would have eventually noticed the loneliness creeping up inside of her and she would not have been able to explain it. Lying could get heavy and she did not think she had the energy to put up with it anymore. At the time, giving up felt like the best option. As she stared at her friend, she realized something. There was something different about her. There were dark circles under her eyes, her skin had an ashy glow to it, almost as if she was sick. Also, her cheeks were sunken in. She did not look like the happy Yuka she used to know. People changed, things happened but what could have made her friend so miserable?

"A-are you alright?"

The question quickly made Yuka uncomfortable. Kagome knew that look; it was the one she herself had when she was trying to come up with a lie. For a moment, she saw a haze of darkness cloud her friend's eyes but as quickly as it had appeared, it disappeared. Yuka pinched her lips, forced a smile and rapidly nodded her head. "Of course."

"Yuka - "

But Kagome was not able to finish her sentence because of friend's expression shifted. She was no longer staring at Kagome, no instead she was staring at something behind her. Her lips were parted and her skin was ghostly white. A tremble took hold of her body and suddenly, the darkness in her dark blue eyes was back. She even took a step back and Kagome worried. She did not have a chance to voice that concern because Yuka was the first to speak.

"Kagome, do you live here?"

Kagome frowned, even more confused than she was before. Yuka knew she lived at the shrine. Did she think her life changed that much in so little time? "Live- live here? What no. Why?"

"I just -" But she could not speak. The situation was weird enough as it was but - but why was Kagome here? She was not supposed to be here.

And then she fell silent but she lifted one of her hands. Inside, tucked between two fingers was a piece of paper. Kagome leaned forward to read what was written on it; it was Kouga's address.

Why did Yuka have a piece of paper with Kouga's address written on it.

Why did -

Oh. God.

Yuka - Yuka was the pregnant human girl!